Do you know any jokes.

SC PL

SC PL

local shitposter
aa
Jun 25, 2015
378
407
Here's another bunch of jokes I heard:

Why Russians in Germany are buying two cars instead of one?
Because to get back to Russia they need to drive trough Poland

To people, who don't get it: There's stereotype about Poles that they steals cars, so they need to buy 2 cars, because one will be stolen

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What's e-mail adress of Hungarian Owl?
hu@hu.hu <- Wut, why this is hyperlinked

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What separates humans from monkeys?
Mediterranean Sea

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Son: Dad, how drunk people see?
Dad: Do you see that four trees? Drunk people see eight trees
Son: But dad, there's only two trees

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Yo mama is so old, she remembers when dead sea was sick

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USSR submarines beats all records in diving
They started diving in 1957 and they still diving

End sorrez four Grammer, Mah Engliesh iz very bad
 
CriminalBunny

CriminalBunny

Lasers are just deadly rainbows
aa
Oct 11, 2013
273
413
I heard this one on the radio: (It was in spanish so I'll do my best translating it)

In a little village there was a priest, a very charming and silver-tongued one, that was convinced that he was the second coming of Jesus. People loved him. Whenever there was mass people from every village, town and cities from the state would travel to see him.

This priest also enacted various events of Jesus' life because, as he claimed he was his reincarnation, it was his duty. Heck, he even got a bunch of apostles for his reenactments.

One day, he noticed that Easter was coming, so he gathered his 12 closest followers and said. "My fellow disciples, I need your help for my most important task yet.. Easter is coming, and I must be crucified so I can then resurrect, as God wants me to."

Everybody was shocked.

His followers were like "I like to act parts of the bible with him, but, not to the point to actually kill him in the cross!". So after a long night discussing what to do, they decide to talk with the police chief about it.

"So, chief..." One of them asked. "You know that priest that calls himself the reincarnation of Jesus, right? He... wants us to crucify him and... kill him... Do you think you could let us do such a thing?"
"Of course!" Answers the police chief.
"Wait. Are you OK with all this?"
"Yeah, but if he doesn't come back to life in 3 days you're all going to jail!"
 
SSX

SSX

aa
Feb 2, 2014
392
411
The Siphon said:
And? The SFM community is going to suffer even more. Currently the times are dark, but there is no light in the horizon.
Click to expand...

From what exactly? FNAF videos? Honestly, if that's your biggest problem with SFM's community, then you really need to check what community you are in here.
 
The Siphon

The Siphon

L6: Sharp Member
Mar 2, 2015
278
190
shadowslasher11 said:
From what exactly? FNAF videos? Honestly, if that's your biggest problem with SFM's community, then you really need to check what community you are in here.
Click to expand...
Ask anyone, the biggest problem is that the workshop gets spammed with re-textured models and other fnaf addons which are not needed. It happens from time to time. Second is that FNAF videos happen to get more views with lower quality. People have stopped making SFM collabs since if you search for SFM collab you can only see fnaf related videos. (which are not actual collabs, just small collab videos that have been copied and re-uploaded. Sure you could search for SFM collab -fnaf, but still there are no collabs. Also in general the amount of copied and re-uploaded fnaf videos is just massive.
 
SSX

SSX

aa
Feb 2, 2014
392
411
The Siphon said:
Ask anyone, the biggest problem is that the workshop gets spammed with re-textured models and other fnaf addons which are not needed. It happens from time to time. Second is that FNAF videos happen to get more views with lower quality. People have stopped making SFM collabs since if you search for SFM collab you can only see fnaf related videos. (which are not actual collabs, just small collab videos that have been copied and re-uploaded. Sure you could search for SFM collab -fnaf, but still there are no collabs. Also in general the amount of copied and re-uploaded fnaf videos is just massive.
Click to expand...

I really don't want to waste the time arguing this; mainly for one, it's not the place to do it. But things happen, shit happens, lower quality that, higher quality that, more views, whatever; life goes on.

We are a part of a community that brings itself to build maps and create games and not to ridicule those that try. (Cept Triple A Devs) It's one thing when this stuff comes from an outside source, but on the interior you're still a part of it. Do not blame Scott for doing something new under a similar name. It is not his fault of what will happen afterwards, that's up to the community involved. Good or Bad SFM you should at the very least, welcome it; as a lot of animators have found an opening of learning the program and going on to do other stuff.

In Short: Get over it. It's not the end of the world. It helps expand your community.
 
Cytosolic

Cytosolic

L5: Dapper Member
May 1, 2015
201
169
I don't think any of these are mine but here you go.

Did anyone read about that scientist who got frozen to absolute zero? No? Well, don't worry, he's 0k now.

What do you get when you put root beer in a square glass? Beer.

5 Romans walk into a bar. They took seats in a corner and their leader tried to order 5 beers, but it was loud and busy in the bar and the bartender couldn't hear what they were saying. So the leader held up five with his fingers and got the message across. But when the bartender returned he only server two beers.

And now for some slightly better one.

How many Marxist supporters does it take to change a light bulb? None, the light bulb has the seeds of it's own revolution.

A trucker was driving down a long, empty road when he saw a priest standing by the side of the road where his car had broken down. He decided to pull over and give him a lift to the nearest town. They drove for a while longer until the driver spotted a lawyer on the side of the road. Speeding up, The driver instinctively drove strait at the lawyer. But, at the last second he remembered the priest sitting next to him and swerved back onto the road. A loud thump was heard. The trucker turned to the priest and said "I'm sorry father, I don't know what got into me back there." The priest replied "That's okay son, I got him with my door."
 
nickybakes

nickybakes

You should've played Rumbleverse
aa
Jul 28, 2015
912
1,741
I was asking my science teacher about how I can do better in the class, he told me I just have to keep my ion the prize.
 
Viemärirotta

Viemärirotta

sniffer
aa
Feb 5, 2016
1,013
590
We seriously need to get fueled with more science jokes.

Anybody know any jokes about Sodium? Na
 
Hyperion

Hyperion

L16: Grid Member
aa
Jun 8, 2015
840
659
My Grandpa said, "Your generation relies too much on technology!"
I replied, "No, your generation relies too much on technology!" Then I unplugged his life support.

What kind of file do you need to turn a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole?
A pedophile.

Shamelessly translated from another forum
 
Last edited:
Yrr

Yrr

An Actual Deer
aa
Sep 20, 2015
1,316
2,756
Cytosolic said:
5 Romans walk into a bar. They took seats in a corner and their leader tried to order 5 beers, but it was loud and busy in the bar and the bartender couldn't hear what they were saying. So the leader held up five with his fingers and got the message across. But when the bartender returned he only server two beers.
Click to expand...
is this not meant to be the other way around?
since two fingers looks like V (5)
 
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