Why do you love steam convos?

[Wilson]

And party ends with a story time!

The chat room has been set to officers-only chat by zpq.
zpq (1): brb guise
zpq (1): back
zpq (1): STORY TIME
zpq (1): WITH OUR GUEST HOST
zpq (1): ALY
zpq (1): Alykins: Once upon a time, there was a story of a whale
Old Man Ninja Turtle: So what was that all about
zpq (1): Alykins: He was a happy whale
Old Man Ninja Turtle: Tapp pretended to be me?
zpq (1): Alykins: He had lots of friends
zpq (1): (Grazr, stop ruining the story!)
zpq (1): Alykins: He was known as DaBeatzProject, as he had da beats
zpq (1): Alykins: One day, he found a princess stranded on an island
zpq (1): Alykins: He found out her name was Alyssea
zpq (1): Alykins: Then SAXTON HALE jumped in and said "THIS IS NOT ROMANTIC ENOUGH" and all of a sudden, in an australian-like POW, They found themselves sitting in a fancy restaurant
zpq (1): Alykins: And Beatz was in his human form
zpq (1): Alykins: It was a happy evening
zpq (1): Alykins: But then! From the door, came a dashing man
zpq (1): Alykins: dressed in dark purple, as dark as the night
zpq (1): Alykins: And he said "THAT ALYSSEA IS MINE!"
zpq (1): Alykins: He was of course, a Snarky Boojum
zpq (1): Alykins: Beatz and Snarky had an epic fight, but in the end they agreed to share their love of whales and entities with the princess in a friendship
zpq (1): Alykins: And everyone was happy
zpq (1): Alykins: The end!

 

[grazr]

Next person to impersonate an officer and act like a moron can take a holiday to calm down for a bit. I know everyone's excited about the contest reaching an end but that behaviour wouldn't be tolerated under normal circumstances.

I know where you live, Tapp.

 

[Wilson]

THE RICARDO COLLECTION
How normal chat would be without ricardo.

Ricardo TF2maps.net: pregnant people win.
Ricardo TF2maps.net: I WIN

Ol' Tricky Dev Measure TF2maps: we? awful? dreams never come true. Time to wake Sleeping
beauty.

Ricardo TF2maps.net: WUBUBUBUBUB = TF2Maps

Ricardo TF2maps.net: and say his gay friend matter... not be shitty bitch.

Ricardo TF2maps.net: Mom scout WINS... she f**** bonk so... scout was like O_-_o

supersandvich: also jesus christ is your map a blue man group concert
supersandvich: looks like all you did was make a gradient
Ricardo TF2maps.net: yeh.
Ricardo TF2maps.net: gradient tool rules

Ricardo TF2maps.net: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VsdIkjjizfw&feature=related THIS IS Circus galop. I can play this blind folded with my dick only.

Ricardo TF2maps.net: wilson can i make a skybox for your map?
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: and i already got skybox for my map
Ricardo TF2maps.net: I want to make custom content for it.
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: I don't need any
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: I got tanker from selentic and trains from selentic too
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: that pretty much all i need
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: least for now
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: Stick
Ricardo TF2maps.net: if i sound homoerotic then why you talk to me.
Ricardo TF2maps.net: oh snap...
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: What?

 

[StickZer0]

Way to steal a couple of the quotes I collected from Ric, Wilson. Give them back.

*takes his pants, fancy momma and sleeping beauty quote back, storing them until the time is right*

 

[Wilson]

Way to steal a couple of the quotes I collected from Ric, Wilson. Give them back.

*takes his pants, fancy momma and sleeping beauty quote back, storing them until the time is right*

Done, tough i have posted sleeping beauty here myself once.

 

[ricardojvc6]

i love how i spread happiness.

 

[Seba]

16:15 - Languid: why is it named draft
16:15 - Languid: why
16:15 - nrd: Because you're blocked
16:15 - nrd: Any other comments on the name?

 

[The Political Gamer]

7:13 PM - NWA Prestige: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W63Zi1g4D90 song gives me bonners
7:14 PM - Nineaxis: you know what gives me a bonner
7:14 PM - Mott: a bonnet?
NWA Prestige was kicked by Nineaxis.

 

[Lord Ned]

TPG Beat me to it. D:

 

[Konata]

8:15 PM - Someone: I hugged a creeper
8:16 PM - Someone: he killed me
8:16 PM - Konata: It's how he shows love
8:16 PM - Someone: yup

 

[Tekku]

20:39 - Ricardo TF2maps.net: sexual collab.. Erotic sessions, gay Pr0no, girl stuff xD

You will never stop impressing me

 

[Cerulean]

It's lengthy, but entertaining. I removed some in-between comments.


Liraxus entered chat.
Liraxus: Um, hello?
Liraxus: I need some help making TF2 work.
Liraxus: Can you guys even hear me? I need help
Mott: ...
Liraxus: im tired of dumbasses spamming grenades in TFC, i wanna play goddamn TF2!
Mott: So open it
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): cool?
Liraxus: Ahaha..
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): whats the problem?
Liraxus: to start off, this computer dosen't have Pixel shader
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist) disconnected.
Mott: You can't play.
Liraxus: when i try to join a server
Liraxus: also, i downloaded something
Liraxus: that fixes the factor that i don't have pixel shader
Mott: Obviously not
Liraxus: actually
Liraxus: i checked the youtube comments, it works
Liraxus: But heres the thing
Liraxus: when i try to check on my players weapons
Liraxus: the game X's out, and a message appears
Liraxus: do you guys know any ways to make it work that will work for a FACT?
Cerulean: new comp
Mott: Buy a new computer
Mott: Damnit Cerulean
Cerulean: YES
Liraxus: *stare*
Liraxus: you think its like that?
Liraxus: its a MIRACLE i am even chattign with you right now
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist) entered chat.
Mott: I dunno what to tell you Liraxus
Liraxus: I'm not giving up.
Liraxus: Valve shouldn't have been stupid and only pay attetnion to people with beter computers
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): your dumb
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): like as nails
Mott: Liraxus
Mott: When's your computer from
Liraxus: I dunno
Liraxus: m dad said its like 5 years old
Mott: Does your mouse have a ball in it
π Moosε: lol
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist):
Liraxus: uh
Liraxus: no
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): http://www.systemrequirementslab.com/cyri/
Mott: Well it's less than 10 years old
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): type in hl2 orange box
Liraxus: wut
Liraxus: I didn't get the orange box
Liraxus: i bought the TF full pack
π Moosε: doesn't matter
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): its what tf2 runs on
π Moosε: yup
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): o hey
Liraxus: um, and also, i don't know how to enter the console
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): you can type tf2 in as well
Liraxus: do i gotta be IN game
π Moosε: wut
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): wut
Liraxus: look
Liraxus: im completely new to steam n stuff
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): i know
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): just go to the website
Liraxus: I will turn on TF2, then return here
Liraxus: ok
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): and type team fortress 2
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): and see if you can run the game
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): :O
Liraxus: waiting
π Moosε: Look, we aren't geek squad.
π Moosε: simplest answer is get a new computer.
Liraxus: ...
Liraxus: it says i can't
Liraxus: *stares at the computer angrily*
Cerulean: dude ya, what are you running?
Liraxus: i dunno if its windows 7 or XP
Cerulean: p3, geforce 4
Cerulean: ati all in one 9800
Liraxus: Intel(R) Celeron(R) CPU 2.40GHz
Cerulean: all in wonder*?
Cerulean: and get a new computer
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): you might want to make sure you can run games before you buy them
Liraxus: *stare*
Liraxus: im a fucking 14 year old.
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): yeah
Mott: So?
Liraxus: DO YOU EXPECT ME TO KNOW HOW TO MAKE THIS CRAP RUN?
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): when i was 14
Mott: Dude I was building computers at 13
Cerulean: well you can start learning
Liraxus: WHY THE FUCK DID VALVE MAKE TF2 SO FUCKING COMPLICATED!
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): i started mapping
Liraxus: I DOWNLOADED WINRAR FOR NOTHING
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): i knew if my computer ran xp or vista
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): I don't like people like you
Cerulean: ^
Mott: Hey guys let's play a game from 2007 with 2004 hardware
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): as if va;ve tried to piss you off
Mott: It should run at full quality!
Mott: People like you are holding the source engine back
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): they did not make it hard
Cerulean: is it even 2004?
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): you did
Liraxus: well
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): because you don't know what you are doing
Mott: It's around 5 years
Liraxus: im pissed
π Moosε: you shouldn't be
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): yeah
π Moosε: well, maybe you should
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): when you get a new computer
π Moosε: but it's not valve's fault
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): it will still be on your steam
Liraxus: DARK
Liraxus: Like i said earlier
Liraxus: its a miracle i am even talkign with you
Mott: Where do you live
Mott: Malaysia?
Liraxus: well...
Liraxus: back to tfc...*cry*
Liraxus left chat.

 

[Wilson]

Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: Question, is Swarmhub still alive
Tapp: selentic is beating it with defribulators made of trains
Selentic: I am?
Selentic: I've been too busy drawing furry porn to work on any models.

 

[Wilson]

Yarr! Phill: fucking hammer is a piece of shit
Muffin: Yes I can't imagine that feels too good Phill
Muffin: Especially the hammer head part

 

[Cerulean]

Gerbil: but those models are good too and I'm using them
Tapp: so was I
Gerbil: Ah xD
Tapp: <_<
Tapp: >_>]
Tapp: OMG A PHONE
Gerbil: a phone?
Gerbil: OH
Gerbil: ok
Tapp: -_-]

 

[Seba]

19:03 - π Okrag: Seba
19:04 - π Okrag: Whoever gets the community weapon first
19:04 - π Okrag: Gets the mackeral
19:04 - π Okrag: The other has to settle for a scattergun
19:04 - ape.jpg: Hm, Okrag
19:04 - ape.jpg: Alright.
19:04 - ape.jpg: You've a deal.
19:04 - ape.jpg shakes hands
19:04 - π Okrag shakes hands

 

[LeSwordfish]

LeSwordfish: what time is gamesday?
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: rare item
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: or tag
[DOLT] re.wind: €2.50 for a key, which gives you a tag then, eh?
[DOLT] re.wind: talk about money sink.
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: The keys are fairly common drop
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: I just wait for key to drop
func_door: I've never seen a key drop, pretty sure they don't
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: They do
func_door: that kind of goes against the concept of crates in this sort of f2p concept
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: All items in shop also drop besides special hats like Mann co cap
[DOLT] re.wind: what fd said
LeSwordfish: um, gamesday? when is it?
π Moosε: what do crates even do
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: and we had two keys drop on ph server today
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: They give you stuff
π Moosε: fucking crates
π Moosε: how do they work
Icarus disconnected.
Icarus entered chat.
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: They can also give you Very Unusual hats
DaBeatzProject: can you find KEYS too?
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: I saw one today
pseüdo left chat.
[DOLT] re.wind: need keys
[DOLT] re.wind: probably beatz
LeSwordfish: what time is gamesday?
Muffin: Why did some of the songs I have suddenly get uber quality
Muffin: That's nice I guess
[DOLT] re.wind: its Link all over again
[DOLT] re.wind: need keys for crates.
[DOLT] re.wind: hehe...
func_door: I don't think they drop yo
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: Pyro with Very Unusual Rubber Glove was on Ph today
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: and holy jesus crisht
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: that hat is awesome
func_door: maybe they drop from gift boxes
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: It leaves behind trail of blue fire
π Moosε: What's so special about them being unusual
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: on ground
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: when you walk around
LeSwordfish: everyone in this chat screws their mothers and dogs alternating
func_door: "very unusual" means custom particle effect
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: And some hats make ghosts fly around you
Jethro: keys CANNOT
Jethro: DROP
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: some make you glow
π Moosε: oh
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: They can
Yarr! Phill: Icarus how'd you get two Mann co hats?
Jethro: Robin SAID SO
Jethro: IN AN EMAIL
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: for the fucking last time THEY CAN
Jethro: ARE YOU CALLING ROBIN A LIER
Icarus: the store bugged out
Icarus: also
Jethro: THE TIME IT DROPPED
Yarr! Phill: nice
Jethro: WAS LIKE WHEN YOU CRAFT A SCRAP METAL
Icarus: http://www.tf2items.com/id/icaruswong Ill trade anythign reasonable for a Jarate or Milk
Jethro: AND IT APPEARS AS "found: scrap metal
LeSwordfish: donkeybuggerers, the lot of you
E² StickZer0: vintage merryweatheer!
func_door: keys don't drop randomly you probably got one from a box or something
π Moosε: icarus
E² StickZer0: lol that would suck
E² StickZer0: if you opened a crate
LeSwordfish: ok, you totally cant see what i say.
E² StickZer0: and got a key
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: Why fuck keys wouldn't drop func
π Moosε: duels :C
Jethro: Wilson
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: Valve said all stuff from update would be free
Jethro: CHECK THE FP
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: so why fuck would getting half of these new hats cost
func_door: no they didn't
LeSwordfish: donkeybuggers, i say again.
func_door: they said most stuff would be free
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: Well not all but new items
Wilson "Sherlock" Wankhouse: like hats and guns
LeSwordfish: ...

it was funny to me, at least. YMMV.

 

[The Political Gamer]

9:29 PM - Littleedge: So on my nightly /b/ check to see if anything interesting's going on, some guy found a dungeon beneath (assumingly) his house.
9:30 PM - Littleedge: Creepy as fuck, man.

 

[Gerbil]

8:44 PM - Gerbil slaps everyone with a fish
8:44 PM - Proromancer: Fine
8:44 PM - Proromancer: OW
8:44 PM - Proromancer: YOU
8:44 PM - Stink Horse: fish taste...
8:44 PM - Proromancer challenges Gerbil to a Fish Duel!
8:44 PM - Gerbil: oh woops thought friendly fire was off
8:44 PM - Stink Horse: Anyone here played Amnesia yet?
8:44 PM - Gerbil: CHALLENGE ACCEPTED
8:44 PM - Gerbil: Not yet.
8:44 PM - Proromancer slaps gerbil some
8:44 PM - Stink Horse: oh man you NEED to
8:45 PM - LeSwordfish: fisho a fisho.
8:45 PM - Gerbil slaps tmp some
8:45 PM - E² StickZer0: oh hey stink
8:45 PM - Stink Horse: I've been rocking it lately
8:45 PM - Stink Horse: Hey Stick!
8:45 PM - Stink Horse: hows it going?
8:45 PM - Matt: Stinkhorse
8:45 PM - Stink Horse: Matt!
8:45 PM - Matt: Prestige is a spy!
8:45 PM - E² StickZer0: gooood, just got me a customised knife
8:45 PM - Stink Horse: Presto was always a spy
8:45 PM - Proromancer pulls out a second mackarel and starts slapping gerbil like a fucking pirouette
8:45 PM - [TF2RP] Ricardo TF2maps.net: Yeh It would be interesting if you make a TF2 Caracther made by clay.
8:45 PM - E² StickZer0: called it The Gentleman's Silent Shank
8:45 PM - LeSwordfish: i'm gonna call my fish trigger_embarrasment
8:45 PM - Gerbil: OH SNAP
8:45 PM - Stink Horse: nice!
Jethro - stainlesspot for demo is now playing Team Fortress 2. Click here to join.
8:45 PM - E² StickZer0: lol sword
8:45 PM - Matt: In the time you've been gone Stinkhorse
8:45 PM - Gerbil: I have been shown
8:45 PM - [TF2RP] Ricardo TF2maps.net: characther*
8:45 PM - Gerbil: WHO IS THE BASS
8:45 PM - E² StickZer0: XD
8:45 PM - Matt: I started and finished a map, and got a hat included in a TF2 update
8:45 PM - Proromancer: XD

 

[Void]

void: I need a car battery
supersandvich:
Matt: That's a terrible layout Tera
void: And a rake
void: I need to kill these two girls
Matt: Did they call you dumb or something
Yarr! Phill is now playing Team Fortress 2. Click here to join.
weapon_penguin: void is a necrophilliac
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): i thik whipsaw a 11
Rikka: they insulted his optimization
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): is ready
Snacks: go on
void: They keep making all these moves on me
void: Then they make fun of me
Rikka: sweet, let's test it
weapon_penguin: rape them
Yarr! Phill: someone had an accident on Tera's hats :\
weapon_penguin: that'll teach em
Dark (I am Jacks Iron Fist): left me do a final compile and build cube maps and such
Tera: D:
LeSwordfish: that happens to me all the time. without the making moves bit
void: No, I either need a rake and a car battery
void: or
void: some boxing gloves
[FIN | TF2M] Vintage Paper left chat.
void: and knives
Matt: You're going to rape them with an electric rake? |:
Rikka: kinky
weapon_penguin: oh man
DaBravoProject disconnected.
weapon_penguin: that sounds like something my girlfriend would tell me
Rikka: that is pretty fucking kinky
void: and they need to stop leaving so much beer around
void: it makes me sick
void: and doesnt help the situation
Matt: Thef uck
weapon_penguin: so stop drinking it void
Rikka: tell them to get gin and vonka
void: theres vodka too
tpg: http://shop.ebay.com/?_from=R40&_trksid=m570&_nkw=Team+Fortress+2
Rikka: vodka
Snacks: is it good beer?
Rikka: is there gin?
supersandvich: counter them by leaving water bottles around
Rikka: or orange juice
π Okrag has changed their name to Okrag.
void: well I get sick if I drink too much
Rikka: we all do
Matt: dude don't fucking drink problem solved
Rikka: is it blue moon?
Rikka: blue moon is pretty good
void: Yeah but I have to drop everything in my hands every few seconds to vomit
Okrag is now playing Team Fortress 2. Click here to join.
Rikka: vomit on them. they'll leave
supersandvich: you dont sound like you enjoy drinking
supersandvich: so why do you drink
Snacks: learn moderation
weapon_penguin: ^
void: AND IT DOESNT HELP THAT I'M IN FORTUNE CITY WITH A BUNCH OF ZOMBIES