Summer Sale!

[tf2.com]

It's summertime and THINGS ARE ON SALE. If only all our writers weren’t at Writer’s Camp they could tell you HOW AWESOME THIS SALE IS. If they wrote something witty about the Scout's new TOWEL you would probably say "I really want to go out right now and buy a towel for MY scout." If they said something sad and revealing about the character of the Scout's new pair of FLIP-FLOPS you would probably say "I care deeply about Flip-Flops, if only I had a pair to show my deep feelings for Flip-Flops!"

Alas, we have no such writer available. We have no one who can write about how these items ARE ONLY AVAILABLE FOR A LIMITED TIME. We have no one who can reiterate in a slightly annoying, but still somewhat funny way THAT YOU HAVE TO BUY THE NEW ITEMS BEFORE THE SALE ENDS ON JULY 11. Indeed, we don't even have two short sentences that would convey that KEYS ARE NOW ON SALE TO OPEN SUMMER COOLERS! See? That was only one sentence and it wasn't particularly short.

Note: The Scout is shown equipped with TWO miscellaneous slot items. We realize this is currently IMPOSSIBLE. After firing the artist responsible, we are now working on making that artist's vision a reality.



Source: TF2.com

 

[HellJumper]

2 Misc slots now. That's... cool I guess.

 

[TheKieranator]

Come on Valve, already Demoman had too many melee weapons, and now you add another? Sure, it's a promo item and functions identically to an Eyelander, but come on! What happened to Demomen doing what Demomen do - blowing shit up?
Also, 2 Misc slots could be interesting.

 

[Fruity Snacks]

tbh, probably one is going to be a pin slot. I remember they were talking about a pin system... or someone was talking about Valve talking about a pin system.

 

[fubarFX]

come on! What happened to Demomen doing what Demomen do - blowing shit up?

a summer without blowing shit up is a summer not worth having

 

[Fruity Snacks]

a summer without blowing shit up is a summer not worth having

Watch more mythbusters?

 

[TheKieranator]

a summer without blowing shit up is a summer not worth having

Don't get me started on that. In my half of the world, it's not even Summer at all, but Winter! Valve could have worded it as a 'Mid-year-ish Sale,' but no. So insensitive. What happens to the southern hemisphere? Do we have to wait until December for this stuff, or are we forced to pretend it's Summer?
/partially pointless joke-ish rant

 

[Pocket]

a summer without blowing shit up is a summer not worth having

Well, that's why Michael Bay has a new Transformers movie out.