Lyrics
Hey there Valve, my name is bran
I wanna request that you guys make a plan
I'm so damn tired of sitting and waiting
You got me all hyped up and now you're just baiting :^/ so

Please give us our UGC medals, I really want to show
that
I got 8th place in Iron, a few seasons ago

I just want one, is that too much to ask?
It really shouldn't be too difficult a task
They gave us our honors, to please our eyes,
But when can we get that in-game prize? Oh

Please give us our UGC medals, I really want to show
that
I got 8th place in Iron, a few seasons ago

Come on now, Valve, this game isn't dead
At least that's what b4nny and Uncle Dane said
New people discover it every day,
And I swear to God that I'm no free-to-play

Please give us our UGC medals, I really want to show
that
I got 8th place in Iron, a few seasons ago, ohh

A few seasons ago
A few seasons ago we got 8th place and it was pretty great
It was pretty great
Please give us our medals

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(Please understand the amount of irony / meme layers)