Pipeball Ultra RC5
Come play with my pipes and balls
You've played Classic Pipeball. You've played Halloween Pipeball. You've even played Medieval Pipeball. But, since spring of 2022 you've only played 2/5ths of the monster that is known only as Pipeball Ultra. Now, behold! NEW AND EXCITING!! It's PIPEBALL ULTRA!! The ACTUAL Pipeball Ultra! That's right! All of it this time! No more teasing! No more being a little piece hidden in a dog's breakfast of a map and then going to a museum for some reason. You've waited almost 10 unbelievable years for this day and here it finally is! No bypassed sections, no modified rules, it's Pipeball Ultra as God intended!
So for those who don't know, here's how this shit works:
The game begins with the main timer at 5 minutes. The teams begin in their primary spawnroom at opposite ends of the rink, and the match starts with the ball being "served" from a pipe in the middle that shoots the ball upwards- like a tip-off in basketball. The objective here is to shoot or melee the ball into the other team's goal pipe, awarding the scoring team one point.
Now here's where it gets... "fucky."
Each team has two control points, or "perks" as I like to call them- that they can capture- one on their side of the rink just beside the main ball serve pipe, and another that's waaaaaaay deep in enemy territory. Capturing the closer point will enable that team's ball cannon- a panel on the rink floor will open to reveal a pipe that will transport the ball to the ball cannon right beside it on the outside, and launch it into the other team's end of the rink. Capturing the furthermost point will take the enemy goal pipe and greatly expand it, making scoring goals a cakewalk.
Now here's where it gets "fuckier."
Scoring a goal in this rink will NOT make you respawn back in your spawnrooms. Nope, once a goal is scored, the main timer pauses, and the scoring team respawns in the scored-on team's spawnroom, while the scored-on team spawns further back into their base. For the next 60 seconds the scored-on team must defend the goal pipe in their "bonus room," while the other team tries to score one more goal. If the defense is successful, the teams respawn in the main rink, the perks are reset, the timer resumes, and the game continues. BUT! If the assault is successful, everyone gets respawned back onto the main rink as usual, but the attacking team is awarded not one, but TWO additional points! That's right! Scoring once in the main rink and again in the bonus room nets your team THREE points! It's like a final point defense in Hydro, only it's not Hydro because nobody plays Hydro.
Now here's where it gets even fuckier.
If a team scores twice in the bonus room consecutively- that is to say, if they score in the main rink, then in the bonus room, on the main rink again, and finally in the bonus room a second time, all without interruption, that team wins the game. Doesn't matter if they're leading by two points or behind by fifty. Two consecutive bonus room goals and all the points go out the window.
Oh? Oh what's that? You think that's it, do you? You're thinking to yourself, "Well this can't possibly get any fuckier," huh? Well that's where you're wrong, pal. This, now, is where it gets the fuckiest of all.
Once the main timer reaches zero, the scores are compared, and the team with the highest number of points wins. Unless, of course, there's a tie. In other Pipeballs past, a special tiebreaker ball would be released. Most would be the instant-kill Black Ball, and that seems to be the crowd pleaser. So, that's what you'll get, and more. Not just one, not two, not three, but FOUR- count 'em, FOUR, instant-kill Black Balls, all dropping into the arena!
Oh, didn't I mention the arena? Yeah. With Sudden Death enabled (seriously, do it! It's fun!), all of you losers get respawned not at the main rink, or the bonus rooms, but on a FOURTH rink that's just a rink with some shields and wall bumpers. No goal pipes here, the only way to win is to kill freaking everyone else on the other team. And with four super-lethal balls flying around, that should be pretty quick. You all asked for Arena mode Pipeball, you got it.
So don't delay! All this super awesome Pipeball goodness can be YOURS to enjoy! All you gotta do is hit that download button! Do it! Do it!
So for those who don't know, here's how this shit works:
The game begins with the main timer at 5 minutes. The teams begin in their primary spawnroom at opposite ends of the rink, and the match starts with the ball being "served" from a pipe in the middle that shoots the ball upwards- like a tip-off in basketball. The objective here is to shoot or melee the ball into the other team's goal pipe, awarding the scoring team one point.
Now here's where it gets... "fucky."
Each team has two control points, or "perks" as I like to call them- that they can capture- one on their side of the rink just beside the main ball serve pipe, and another that's waaaaaaay deep in enemy territory. Capturing the closer point will enable that team's ball cannon- a panel on the rink floor will open to reveal a pipe that will transport the ball to the ball cannon right beside it on the outside, and launch it into the other team's end of the rink. Capturing the furthermost point will take the enemy goal pipe and greatly expand it, making scoring goals a cakewalk.
Now here's where it gets "fuckier."
Scoring a goal in this rink will NOT make you respawn back in your spawnrooms. Nope, once a goal is scored, the main timer pauses, and the scoring team respawns in the scored-on team's spawnroom, while the scored-on team spawns further back into their base. For the next 60 seconds the scored-on team must defend the goal pipe in their "bonus room," while the other team tries to score one more goal. If the defense is successful, the teams respawn in the main rink, the perks are reset, the timer resumes, and the game continues. BUT! If the assault is successful, everyone gets respawned back onto the main rink as usual, but the attacking team is awarded not one, but TWO additional points! That's right! Scoring once in the main rink and again in the bonus room nets your team THREE points! It's like a final point defense in Hydro, only it's not Hydro because nobody plays Hydro.
Now here's where it gets even fuckier.
If a team scores twice in the bonus room consecutively- that is to say, if they score in the main rink, then in the bonus room, on the main rink again, and finally in the bonus room a second time, all without interruption, that team wins the game. Doesn't matter if they're leading by two points or behind by fifty. Two consecutive bonus room goals and all the points go out the window.
Oh? Oh what's that? You think that's it, do you? You're thinking to yourself, "Well this can't possibly get any fuckier," huh? Well that's where you're wrong, pal. This, now, is where it gets the fuckiest of all.
Once the main timer reaches zero, the scores are compared, and the team with the highest number of points wins. Unless, of course, there's a tie. In other Pipeballs past, a special tiebreaker ball would be released. Most would be the instant-kill Black Ball, and that seems to be the crowd pleaser. So, that's what you'll get, and more. Not just one, not two, not three, but FOUR- count 'em, FOUR, instant-kill Black Balls, all dropping into the arena!
Oh, didn't I mention the arena? Yeah. With Sudden Death enabled (seriously, do it! It's fun!), all of you losers get respawned not at the main rink, or the bonus rooms, but on a FOURTH rink that's just a rink with some shields and wall bumpers. No goal pipes here, the only way to win is to kill freaking everyone else on the other team. And with four super-lethal balls flying around, that should be pretty quick. You all asked for Arena mode Pipeball, you got it.
So don't delay! All this super awesome Pipeball goodness can be YOURS to enjoy! All you gotta do is hit that download button! Do it! Do it!
