[Judge Vote] Boojums' Review Thread

Discussion in 'Contests' started by A Boojum Snark, Jun 15, 2010.

  1. A Boojum Snark

    aa A Boojum Snark Toraipoddodezain Mazahabado

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    Bedrock
    Optimization: 5
    Overall fairly good, the general layout does basic vis blocking well enough, though there are a few issues.
    [B04] [B21] The map actually renders end-to-end when you are standing here. Some horizontal hints above player height but below the roofline separating the yards from the mid might help.
    [B05] It is entirely unecessary to AP+Detail the roof, just leave it as a world brush and it will cut the rendered amount much more.
    [B08] [B09] [B13] [B14] These brushes should be nodraw, as it is created needless lightmap data. This little won't hurt rendering, though it would add up if there was a bunch.

    Style: 4
    The styling that is there is good, buildings feel like they belong in TF2. I prefer more spytech themeing in a map, but with your small open-air layout there isn't a lot you could have done and the worn-out computers are an interesting take on it. The detailing is lacking, with lots of large boring surfaces and some visual errors.
    [B07] The cart seems to be embedded in the cliff!
    [B11] [B24] Always align wood to the length of the beam.
    [B20] Alt+Rightclick to match a texture to the selected face.
    [B22] This corner is just all kinds of ugly. I'd start by getting rid of those super skinny displacements, they are very difficult to make look nice.
    [B23] This shadowing is because the displacements aren't sewn.

    Other notes:
    [B06] Need some playerclip and/or displacement tweaking here.
    [B10] [B19] Crack!
    [B18] Clip or non-solid the vent.
    • You've got numerous props that need to be set to non-solid because they have no collision mesh. See console after loading map.


    Cloudburst
    Optimization: 6
    Excellent, I have very little to pick at here. Areas/leaves get cut off well when rounding corners and walking about. My only suggestion would be fade distances on the trees behind spawn, since they can't be seen from afar due to the building, but still get rendered.

    Style: 5
    Good stuff here, nice detail density though the cave feels a little empty, maybe it's just the shape. The big L building and to a lesser extent the spawn and intel buildings feel flat without any trim, in contrast the Novint Logging building looks great with the hefty wood beams trimming the edges. I think it could use a little less canyon feel around the edges, but it's not terribly noticeable.
    [CB02] This corner is hideous.
    [CB03] It seems odd to have two different kinds of light fixtures serving the same purpose.
    [CB05] [CB06] the fade distances should be raised on these windows because they are near to where the player will be looking/focusing for enemies, so they are more noticable when they are gone. Plus, they stay rendered nearly until you wouldn't be able to see them anyway, so raising it a couple hundred units wouldn't hurt much.

    Other notes:
    [CB00] You've got two clips here, the one on the railing and the skinnier one on the metal. It feel weird to be able to stand on the railing next to the metal, plus you get caught on the bits sticking out of the clip. It's also awkward not to be able to jump through the gaps between the sheets because it's playerclipped.
    [CB01] Meep.
    [CB04] Pickiness... it wouldn't be able to rotate in the wind (the tail part) because of the roof.


    Converge
    Optimization: 6
    Excellent optimization. The areaportal comments are extremely nitpicky, but they aren't really enough to skew the score, just included for thoroughness.
    [CV10] [CV05] Need some nodraw here.
    [CV00] That areaportal is dead weight, there is so little in the room and the window is so large it won't do much.
    [CV03] Same with these two. So large they won't do much, and the one on the left at the doorframe is sufficient for culling down that hall.
    [CV04] I'd suggest leaving the two closed windows as world brushes and making the areaportal fill the depth of the window area on the open one. The window area is already three skinny leaves the length of it, so you wouldn't be gaining leaves from doing it that way.
    [CV02] Why so many computers? You can only see the front row from outside.
    [CV06] Put some harsh fade distances on the crates inside here.

    Style: 6
    The outside buildings feel a tad flat, I'm not sure why, might be because this [CV16] part stands out being a different color, but is in fact very bland with nearly nothing going for it. Otherwise, everything feels good and the detailing is nicely dispersed around the map.
    [CV11] Sun angle does not match light angle.
    [CV12] There are some obnoxious white dots in the cubemap for this room that show up in the window. I think they are the two lights directly overhead. I suspect you have the cubemap up in the air close to the lights so move it near the floor. Players spend most of their time on the ground so that is where it's best to have cubemaps generated from.
    [CV13] Two logos in the same place?
    [CV14] The computers fade out too fast, and you can see them pop in when you return to spawn. Looks like the end dist should be the start.

    Other notes:
    • You need a custom mapname.txt with the proper game mode description.
    • You've got props that need to be set to non-solid because they have no collision mesh. See console after loading map.
    [CV15] These lights actually have an off skin that you may want to use.


    Deliverance
    Optimization: 5
    There is a lot being rendered at the middle, but that's the nature of the layout. Otherwise quite good.
    [D24] Some fade distances on the trees and such in the base areas might help. If they cut out somewhere around the mid-point of the map I don't think there would be too many issues with not seeing them while rocket jumping.

    Style: 7
    I hesitated to score a seven, mostly because I have a distaste for the gloom of alpine storm maps, but I do think you pull off the theme as close to perfect as you can. I'd also be inclined to desire more spytech, but the drilling machines make a good substitute as the focal (bifocal?) point/reason of the map. The custom soundscape is also a nice bit of polish on the top.
    [D25] This corner is a little sharp.

    Other notes:
    [D23] Clipping... you can't land up there all the time, but I think it's because of the 45 degree angle that the slight slope of the clip brush ends up catching you.


    Fusion
    Optimization: 5
    Good use of hint brushes around the corners to the center. Could use some fade on the trees here and there that get obscured by buildings but are still rendered. Quite a bit of everything being rendered though.
    [F13] [F14] A few faces that could be nodrawed.
    [F02] The metal sheets in the back don't really need to be there, nobody is going to really see them.

    Style: 6
    We haven't had much industrial winter yet, which makes it interesting. It feels a little off from TF2 at times, perhaps it's an imbalance with too much industrial, but it looks good and the spytech is nice. Detailing is very solid.
    [F00] Seam.

    Other notes:
    • You seem to have some missing soundscapes, see console after load.


    Landfall
    Optimization: 4
    The render culling is good, there isn't too much more that could be done, but the sheer amount of stuff [L08] being rendered is excessive. A lot of the trees/rocks around the border of the map could use fade distances to prevent them rendering when you are halfway across the map and can't see them because of crates or the giant tree. The giant trees in the skybox seem really high poly (the trunks that is) for what they are, how far away they are, and the low visibility of them. I'd say make a drastically simpler one to use for all but the two right behind the fence.
    [L15] Quite a bit extra being rendered that is far around the corner, perhaps some hints can slice it up better.
    [L16] Areaportals that big are going to be as useful as dalokohs. All your buildings seem to be AP sealed, so I don't think it's needed to prevent a leak either.
    [L17] Might want to offset these two areaportals so they don't merge.
    [L04] [L05] [L06] Nodraw.

    Style: 6
    The detailing is good, but there doesn't seem to be much point to the map. It's all just wood buildings in a forest. The grated area under the intel is worse than lumberyard's at hinting towards anything. That said, the wooden buildings are executed well.
    [L09] Misaligned wood on the angle, and the fence going through the roof is weird.

    Other notes:
    [L07] The framework could use a playerclip. Same with the ones behind me by the building.


    Mercy
    Optimization: 6
    Very good vis cutting, mostly due to the compact layout with 90 degree corners.
    [M17] [M22] [M23] [M24] Glass needs nodrawing, along with a handful of these faces in the middle that are entirely hidden by the ground. Same with the large areas covered by func_detail.

    Style: 3
    The detailing is as acceptable levels, and any one "scene" looks good, but all put together it doesn't really make sense. It's just a whole bunch of widely varied buildings stuck together with no real point. I don't quite get the concrete hills in the middle either.
    [M18] Putting that texture at an angle just doesn't work... concrete block walls aren't build on slopes. The arrows (two?!) seem silly since you'd already be well into the hallway with no other options for where to go. The I-beam with the illuminated bits in it really doesn't fit in, either (they're the wrong color on red's side).
    [M11] The fronts of your stairs all have the same X offset resulting in unsightly repetition.
    [M12] You've got a few of these stains around the map oriented the "wrong" way. It's meant to be something flowing from the small dark area to the large light area.
    [M14] Mann Co. Lightbulbs, now infused with 600% more pure sunlight! The env_lightglows you've used on a bunch of your lights seem to be set up all wrong, resulting in far too bright a glow when you move to a distance where there should be nearly none.
    [M18] Bucket and create are embedded in the concrete.


    Overlook
    Optimization: 5
    My picture points say pretty much everything I can think of. Other than that it's alright.
    [O21] [O22] Because of the small window by the truck the intel room is being rendered significantly while outside (and vise versa). I'd suggest just sealing off the window, it's kinda neat, but certainly not worth this. Plus the door under it on the inside would open half buried in the dirt.
    [O26] Could really use some large fade distances on a lot of the props so they aren't rendering from the complete opposite side of the map.
    [O27] [O28] [O29] Nodraw large unseen faces.
    [O31] Good nodrawing over here, missed a face though.

    Style: 6
    I like the intel room a lot, very nice spytech, especially the two-part ceiling and the split support beams. The enemy intel piling up at the desk is a really neat touch. If there were bonus points in this you'd get some. The outside is almost too detailed, a few areas have dense that makes for busy visuals. The rock displacements are nicely done too.
    [O30] Why is there intel sitting out in the open like that?
    [O32] This is a little blinding.
    [O35] 1 2 3 4 5, 6, 7... 8. Eight vents/chimenys all in one area. I'd remove some, especially from the five lower ones.

    Other notes:
    [O25] These poor poor faces. The cylinders shouldn't be part of the same entity as the block they are sitting on. Make one or the other a func_detail (I'd say the block) and leave the other as the func_lod.
    [O33] I don't think you intended to leave this open, if not remember to nodraw the top when you clip it off.
    • The spec cams are horrid, never mirror them unless you have multiples, and juggle the cloning so they cycle in an order that doesn't put mirrored cams one after another. Even then it can be bad.


    Stockpile
    Optimization: 4
    Average render culling, though there is a vis-line from intel yard to intel yard. It could be fixed by making the two largest walls of the center building world brushes, but that would have limited affect on rendering from the middle area. The issue might improve when the areaportal issue below is fixed. Many props need fade distances.
    [S23] Massive areaportals are massive. Any portals on the same plane will be merged, and when they end up like this they are no help to anything. Offset them a few units on opposite sides of the map so they won't merge.
    [S00] Put some fade distances on all these barrels.
    [S01] [S02] [S03] [S04] [S05] [S06] [S07] Faces needing nodraw.
    [S08] This whole building, including the roof overhangs, is world brush.

    Style: 4
    Detailing is sparse in places and doesn't seem to have give purpose to an area. Most of it is just crates and barrels or other random "filler" props, no storytelling themeatic props. The two separating walls that are just a huge assortment of different shaped and styled buildings is a little odd, mostly because they are thin and you can go inside them, in contrast to having something like that as background decoration. The 3D sky is nice, very plain but it's well done and I like the farminess.
    [S25] Big spotlights on in the daytime is weird, and seeing beams only happens if it's foggy or at night.

    Other notes:


    Wildfire
    Optimization: 6
    Great render culling due to the layout design, plenty of prop fades.
    [WF03] [WF04] [WF05] [WF10] [WF11] Nodraw candidates.

    Style: 6
    Detailing is great. The overall feel of the new theme is interesting. I like the forest outpost/observatory setting with a rocket under the dome. I still think the random dish with a bridge across it is weird and doesn't make any sense. The skybox is neat but suffers from some obvious corners.
    [WF01] Wrong color speakers.
    [WF02] Is this supposed to be this bright?
    [WF06] Some funky edges here, and that one in the corner should be moved under the surface.
    [WF07] Wee little crack.
    [WF08] Texture seam.
    [WF09] Do you want the concrete block seams lined up?
    [WF12] This tree fades out way too abrupt and early.
    [WF13] Is there a reason these lights are so orange?

    Other notes:
    [WF00] The env_lightglows aren't really doing anything. They're too far behind anything to ever actually render since they need to be visible within the geometry proxy size range.


    Wiretap
    Optimization: 6
    Good use of areaportals and layout to limit the rendering, quite a jump from Scoville.
    [WT18] [WT19] [WT21] [WT22] [WT23] Backsides and buried faces in need of nodraw. Don't forget the rest of the computer panels not pictured.
    [WT20] The three round tanks and everything in the window room could use fade distances.

    Style: 5
    It seems like "too much cool" here. The entire bases are high tech and even the outbuildings are loaded with computers. It's all well formed but there is just too much I think. The tops of the bases feel too visually busy and cluttered... radio tower, satellite dish, transformers, fans, and windows. None of it really stands out because it's all right next to each other. The overall quality of individual areas of detailing is good. Lastly, a lot of your cliffs have perfectly flat tops.
    [WT15] Is there a reason for using an ugly brush door without a model frame? The bottom edge is also z-fighting with the frame.
    [WT16] The lightglows the lightglows! They're all really bright, could do with having a grayer color. Plus having such enormous glows on the tiny groundlight001 is a little odd. The glows on the long fixtures have an annoying habit of flickering at certain angles because of the cage on the fixture.
    [WT24] Where's this door supposed to go? There is a vent on the other side.

    Other notes:
    • Non-collision props that need non-solid setting. See console after load.
    [WT02] Need some clip brush here. Also nodraw behind the door obviously.
    [WT17] Ahem.
     
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    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 23, 2010
  2. Okrag

    aa Okrag Wall Staples

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    'Bout gosh darn time Boojumundo.
     
  3. A Boojum Snark

    aa A Boojum Snark Toraipoddodezain Mazahabado

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    If you look at the post date, they were done. Flame just got impatient for some reason and wanted his revealed, then Icarus and super followed suit :|
     
  4. Okrag

    aa Okrag Wall Staples

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    Flaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaame!
     
  5. MangyCarface

    aa MangyCarface Mapper

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    Thorough and fair as usual.
     
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  6. Ezekel

    Ezekel L11: Posh Member

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    one thing i noticed: you comment on optimisation and style (and award scores based on that), but what about gameplay?
    for a competitive contest, isn't that an important area to conduct ratings on?

    in fact going back to the original thread about the contest it says the judging will be on style, optimisation, gameplay and class involvement.

    i'm not trying to say your points are invalid, only that i feel your feedback/review/judement is lacking in 2 key areas.
     
  7. MangyCarface

    aa MangyCarface Mapper

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    As I understood it judges voted on areas they deemed themselves most fit to judge. For example, Flame focused on gameplay...
     
  8. Ezekel

    Ezekel L11: Posh Member

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    ah, ok.
    well as long as it all balanced out in the end and wasn't top heavy in any category because of that (from what i've seen, i'd say it was balanced out).
     
  9. Lancey

    aa Lancey Currently On: ?????

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    When you mentioned that unnecessary lightmap data was being built, I was confused because if I recall correctly nodraw still builds lightmap data.
     
  10. A Boojum Snark

    aa A Boojum Snark Toraipoddodezain Mazahabado

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    Mangy is correct.

    Nerd is not.
    You can check it yourself one of two ways. Compare the "square feet" VRAD reports during compile when a given face is or isn't nodraw, and also you can check lump 8's filesize inside the BSP using GCFscape.
     
  11. TheBladeRoden

    TheBladeRoden L7: Fancy Member

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    What is this? A command that renders playerclips?
     
  12. Ravidge

    aa Ravidge Grand Vizier

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    r_drawclipbrushes 2
    might be interested in vcollide_wireframe 1 too, it renders wireframe on solid props only.
     
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    Last edited: Jun 24, 2010