Memoirs of a Spy

A TF2Maps 72 Hour Summer Jam fanfic

  1. Tasty Salamanders
    Memoirs of a Spy​

    Spy sat at the desk of his smoking room, while normally he would be sitting in his lounge chair reading one of the classics tonight he was going to work on his memoirs. After a hard day of assassination and subterfuge he had soaked in his bubble bath, ate his traditional roast dinner cooked with herbs few knew the names of, smoked a cigar rolled a hundred years ago by monks who died of lung cancer, and now sipped on red wine made from graphs harvested from a single crevice in some French valley where the sun glistened off the grapes just right. No one would read these memoirs, Spy would lock them in a safe which would incinerate them upon his death, he was a professional who would not spill his secrets; whether they be about his work or himself, but he was also a distinguished gentleman and all distinguished gentlemen needed memoirs.

    Spy slowly typed away as he considered his work, from his bosses down to the fellow mercenaries he spent day in and day out killing people on behalf of Mann Co. The relationship he had with them was... difficult to describe he thought. He respected their ability to kill and achieve results and as his colleges he placed a level of trust in them to have his back so he wouldn't get killed, that all being said most of them were insane, idiots, or both. There were some who he knew were sane and intelligent, such as their Engineer, however the Engineer was distrustful of spies, and while the Engineer had Southern Manners; Spy himself found his manners distasteful.

    Some he knew were more intelligent then they let on, and their sanity? Questionable. The Heavy was loud and bulking, he was smart but hid behind simple tastes and desires, Spy and Heavy did find common ground in their issues their nationalities produced with the Soldier who was without a doubt completely insane and a complete idiot. Recently however Soldier had gone easier on Heavy as he had became his future brother-in-law. Heavy however would preferred to have Soldier still be going hard on him rather then marry his sister, Spy was frequently subject to Heavy's laments about the situation, Spy however did think that Soldier and Zhanna were a good match for each other though... in all the worst ways possible. At the very least one Soldier was enough, having someone who matched his behaviour also hanging around was too much.

    As his thoughts went over his team they settled on a particularly troubled relationship, Scout. Scout. There were thoughts there which Spy preferred to run from rather then acknowledge or even think about, even though this extended beyond his work, or rather the fact it extended beyond his work is where the trouble began. It was some time ago that his colleges discovered his intimate relationship with Scout's mother, a fact that further strained Spy and Scout's already strained professional relationship. Of course afterwards their colleges with even a smidgen of intelligence had noticed some of their physical similarities and the way Scout differed in appearance to the pictures they had seen of Scout's older brothers. Despite the issues Spy had with some of them, he remained appreciative of how they remained silent and respectful they were, if there was anything that solidified his trust in them it was that.

    Spy finished his glass of wine and his latest chapter of the memoirs, despite what he had considered and thought about while writing, nothing in the chapter had anything to do with his team. Spy is the only person who knows what he wrote and will see to it that he is the only one who ever will.
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